I once knew of an old man

who’s words would fly through sing.

And if you could listen to his brief songs

oh, what joy they would bring.

And now that old man, that poor old man

he rests beneath the floor.

But if you remember his sweet old voice

his joy can be spread once more.

Though death may be countless and undefinable

you can overcome it, it’s true.

Just sing some more while you’re here today

and the gift of life comes to you.

And so as I leave the church he now lives

 As I hear the brass bells ring,

I can hear that sweet old man once more

and the sweet songs he used to sing.

I love this poem by Simon Armitage

Of all the public places, dear
to make a scene, I’ve chosen here.

Of all the doorways in the world
to choose to sleep, I’ve chosen yours.
I’m on the street, under the stars.

For coppers I can dance or sing.
For silver-swallow swords, eat fire.
For gold-escape from locks and chains.

It’s not as if I’m holding out
for frankincense or myrrh, just change.

You give me tea. That’s big of you.
I’m on my knees. I beg of you.

I guess the definition of a ‘true lad’ is one that focuses primarily on losing their virginity and going out and getting with a lot of girls. I don’t enjoy that. I say to my friends “Hey I’m gonna get with so many girls tonight” as a joke but when it comes to the party I don’t perform. I genuinly don’t like kissing girls for the ‘fun’ of it.

Speaking of which I don’t really see it as fun. I see it as something to do when you care about somebody at that moment in time, and it’s a way of just sharing the temporary feelings. I don’t get why you’d do it to some random girl at a party who you have no interest in except sexually. I mean, if you like that girl and have feelings for her then go for it, because that’s the only thing stopping me from trying.

I play truth or dare with my friends, and when it gets to the ‘get with so and so’ dare I don’t do it. Why? Because it would be awkward, and as much as I feel close to them and love them it’s not the right way of expressing them kind of friendly feelings. It’s just a stupid part of an otherwise fun game.

I’ve matured a lot. Seriously, I can’t even believe I’m writing this, because just a year ago I was going on about how I wanted a relationship that was just kissing etc and no responsibility. And now I want that responsibility more than anything else in a relationship.

Of course I see some sort of attraction to the appearance of the girls I like, but that isn’t the definitive factor that makes me attracted to them on a whole. This may sound shallow, but some of the girls I have been out with, I’ve been so proud. I’ve been proud to have went out with them and spend time with them, and it made me smile when I clicked on my profile on Facebook and it reminded me that I was going out with, to me then, the perfect girl to me. I loved spending time with them, and I loved holding hands and everything that came with it.

So you can call me gay for saying all this, but honestly, I just needed to let somebody know this, even if it was a crappy Tubmlr page with only 8 followers. Trust me though I’m not homosexual or sexually frustrated. I just like that type of relationship where I can talk to someone and not feel guilty I’m annoying them and constantly tell them they’re pretty and compliment them.

Okay. I’m done now.